It probably happens to every bookworm from time to time. You are cruising along through a book and a character says something that makes you pause and go “Wow. That is me. Absolutely 100% me.” It could be positive, negative, happy, sad, neutral, whatever. It happens.
It happened to me tonight. Not for the first time and certainly not the last either. But for the first time it is something so incredibly poignant, I can not even find adequate words right now. All I can say is that this is exactly how I feel every single day of my life.
I worried I had screwed up my life beyond salvage many years ago, and I’d never have a normal life. That all around me were people who seemed to understand what life was all about, who made plans and looked forward to things. I stood outside, looking in through the glass. Other people celebrated milestones I couldn’t understand. Meanwhile, I was so busy getting through the chaos from one minute to the next, always promising myself that any day now I was going to get my act together, but I was always too busy or too distracted or too something, and I never did. Whenever good things happened in my life—and I was grateful that they did—it always seemed to have happened by accident, almost in spite of my plans rather than because of them. The truth was, I felt more comfortable when things were going wrong, because that was what I felt I deserved. ~ from Wicked Wisteria by Angela Pepper
Until next time, y’all. xoxo